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Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Moving on

I am pushing past the feelings of shame and guilt. They are what they are, and I am entitled to feel them. I am not entitled to let those feelings affect how I treat Tessa or the plans I make regarding her education, so I am getting over them and will do my best to help her thrive and succeed, no matter what we find out in the course of the testing this summer.

Having dyslexia is certainly going to affect her life, and it will make some things harder, but people do succeed in spite of, and maybe even because of, learning disabilities. It is not a death sentence.

I have already been given one of those for one of my children, and this doesn't even come close. Yes, it hurts that Tessa may have a learning disability, but as I thought about it last night, I realized nothing hurts worse than hearing "Incompatible with Life" or "I'm sorry, sweetie, but there's no heartbeat." I thought about my friend Stephanie and her little Logan, and how she would give anything to have him here, learning disability or not. I think about all my friends here in deadbabyland, and I have come to a conclusion.

In the grand scheme of things:

It's not a big deal.

We will get through this. She will learn and thrive because we will help her. All that matters is that she's here with us, and we love her. She is and always will be my high-spirited spunky little girl.


JenJen said...

Just like everything else in life, you will learn how to adapt to this challenge for Tessa. This will make things harder for Tessa but I know that you will put all the right tools in her hands so that she is still succesful! You're a great mom and great moms want everything great for their kids.

Hey, I'm embarassed to say this...but, I failed kindergarden because I wouldn't listen to anyone and wanted to play all day. Have you noticed lately how much I rock ;) Tessa will totally kick a** and take names, too...

And, take it easy on yourself, momma!

Jennifer said...

I wanted to let you know about another thing to think about. We thought that our oldest has been struggling with Dyslexia for a while now. We found out recently that he has vision problems. He has perfect vision at 20/20 and we had that checked a while ago. He has convergence dysfunction as well as tracking issues. It means that his eyes are “popping” in and out of focus while he is reading and he is unable to clearly read. This gets diagnosed by some but not all vision doctors. You will want to look for a vision specialist in your area that can do vision therapy. If you have more question or want some help finding a specialist just let me know.