"There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn, and people we can't live without but have to let go." ~Author Unknown
I found this quote on another blog I visit, and it really touched me and brought tears to my eyes. I understood all of it.
I didn't want Jenna to have Trisomy 18, and I didn't want her to die, but I had to accept the fact that it was going to happen. The trip to Atlanta and the outcome, I didn't want that to happen either, but it did and I had to accept that.
I wish I had never had to hear about Trisomy 18 or its effects, but I had to learn so I could help others who have been in this situation. I never wanted to know what it felt like to lose a child, but now I do and can be there for someone else who has lost a baby. I want to teach people about this disorder, to educate the world about it, and I never could have done that without Jenna having it and learning about it that way.
People we can't live without -- well, I have lost two of those, my granny and my Jenna. Life does go on, but it's changed. You can live without them, just not the same life you had before. Sometimes, letting go is the hardest, but best, thing you can do for someone. It wasn't for the best that Jenna had Trisomy 18, but because of all the defects the disorder caused her, it was for the best for her to die in utero before she had a chance to feel pain. Letting go of her was hard, but it had to be done. Granny had a series of strokes and Parkinson's Disease. She wasn't really living. Bringing her home to die and letting her go without prolonging her agony was the most loving and humane thing we could have done. It didn't make it easy. It doesn't mean that we didn't wish we didn't have to do it. It didn't keep us from feeling sad and hurt, but we knew we had to let go.
That quote just sums up my life for the last few months. I'm displaying it on my blog so others can see it.
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