tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8910344092058694056.post7515059987940173328..comments2023-10-28T05:48:01.985-07:00Comments on Motherhood The Sequel: Shame and guiltMrs. Motherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11548716422011525616noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8910344092058694056.post-85331877751297060772010-06-01T20:23:02.000-07:002010-06-01T20:23:02.000-07:00I have a brother who was diagnosed with ADD and he...I have a brother who was diagnosed with ADD and he always tested off the charts. ADD does not necessarily mean "dumb" it just means that you learn differently. My brother is well read and articulate, he can rattle off all kinds of statistics and memorized anything easily. But he didn't finish high school. I blame my mom for this because she was not his advocate (That's another story for another day). He did not learn well in a traditional classroom. He just didn't. He did go to Syl.van learning centers (I don't know if they have that in your area) which said they had never had anyone test as high as he did (he really is very intelligent!) and they helped him find the best way for him to learn. It was well worth the money.<br /><br />I also have another brother who has some sort of learning disability. He was very slow to learn. When he was in first grade his teacher suggested he be held back. He could have passed, but she thought he could benefit by staying back another year and maturing. As she put it "It's easier to repeat the first grade than the fifth." At some point they believed he would have to be held back, and they would rather him repeat first grade. My mom made the (wise) decision to hold him back. He was one of the oldest kids in his class, but that just meant he was one of the first to get a driver's license! :) It was really the best thing she could have done. He didn't struggle like he did before, and that extra year gave him the boost he needed. He's 31 now, and a happy successful adult. He did not struggle through school, and I suspect that he really would have if my mom didn't hold him back in the first grade.<br /><br />Sorry this is so long! Good luck!<br /><br />(And don't feel like a failure. It's hard not to feel guilty or take the blame when our kids struggle. Sometimes it really has nothing to do with us.)B's Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15884800524058312982noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8910344092058694056.post-13672809227180430632010-06-01T11:35:28.907-07:002010-06-01T11:35:28.907-07:00I think we all have some expectations of our child...I think we all have some expectations of our children, and get a little disappointed when they don't meet them. The best you can do is roll with the punches, and I think you are doing that in spades. I hope the guilt and shame leave you, and I think once you see her thriving in this new environment, they will quickly dissipate. <br /><br />Your sweet girl IS bright, but may just need help learning in a way that makes sense to her. You will be teaching her is to get the help she needs. And like the poster above me here, I have met many people who are dyslexic (my colleague is), and he is one of the brightest minds I have come across---and he managed to get his PhD as well. <br /><br />Hugs---Reesehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05413272465193894312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8910344092058694056.post-25631479988701706312010-06-01T04:52:25.354-07:002010-06-01T04:52:25.354-07:00One of my best friends was diagnosed with dyslexia...One of my best friends was diagnosed with dyslexia in the 2nd grade. She said it was one of the best things to happen to her. Because it was identified early she was able to get the help she needed. She was classified through high school but was in main stream honors classes and an honor student. She's currently taking courses toward a PhD in Occupational Therapy. Everyone learns differently. It's good that you're taking steps to identify the way your child learns early in her education. It will certainly make things easier for her in the long run.jordgubbenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14073615282559998800noreply@blogger.com