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Saturday, August 21, 2010

When good things happen

I met with a friend of mine on Thursday. I have mentioned her on this blog before. Back in February, her little boy, who was only four years old, was tragically killed in a car accident as the family traveled to visit other family members in Louisiana. They were, of course, devastated, as were anyone else who met the family. Here's a link to my original blog post, http://motherhoodthesequel.blogspot.com/2010/02/tragedies.html.

She took her tragedy and turned it into something for hope. She is starting a support group in our area for families who have lost children. I know it makes her feel productive and as if she is doing something to help others, just the way I feel about my future career as a grief counselor. Since I still have contacts at the local newspaper, she wanted me to write the story, and I couldn't tell her no.

We talked about Logan at our meeting, and I brought up Jenna. I told her that I knew it wasn't the same thing, as we didn't have her for as long as she had Logan. I have always felt so funny talking to my friend about her, because I was so afraid she would feel as though there wasn't any comparison. While we were talking, she said, "I know it's different, and you didn't have Jenna as long as we had Logan, but she was still your child and it still hurts." I needed to hear her say that, because I feel like it validated my grief in her eyes. I don't know if that makes sense or not, but I guess I just want people to see that, yes, I did lose a child, even though she hadn't been born yet.

Well, tonight, my friend texted me about the story I wrote and gave me some of the most wonderful news. She is pregnant. I am so happy for her. I told her this baby was her rainbow, the beauty after the storm. She loved that. I love when good things happen to people, especially those who have experienced something so tragic as her family has. No baby is ever going to replace Logan, just like Ella or any other baby couldn't replace Jenna, but a new baby offers hope and happiness where there might not be any from before, and my friend so desperately needed that new hope and happiness.

If you could keep her in your thoughts, I would appreciate it, and since she's a praying person, I'm sure she would appreciate prayers, too. I hope she has the easiest pregnancy and delivery imaginable.

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