Being due on Thanksgiving scares me a little. I was due on Christmas with Jenna and look what happened. I'm so afraid of another holiday being ruined for me.
Christmas will never be the same now that Jenna is gone. I know I will always feel at least a little sadness on that day because our second child is not here.
Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. In fact, it probably is my favorite holiday. Even though I'm not religious, I think it's a wonderful idea to be thankful and grateful for all the good things in your life. How am I going to feel if we lose this baby, too?
I'm trying to be optimistic, but it's really hard when you've experienced a loss. Also, I think I know too much now. I keep thinking that I'll be able to stop worrying once we have the CVS done, but I know that isn't quite true. Being a member of deadbabymoma land, I know there is still a chance for uterine rupture, premature rupture of membranes, cord accidents, unexplained fetal demise and premature birth. And, after that, there is always SIDS.
I guess I'm just hoping that come Thanksgiving, I'll have even more to be thankful for this year, and it won't be a ruined holiday for me.
Living Room with Fireplace Design Ideas
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